How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

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Turtles

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Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

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What in the world is that thing in her butt!!!

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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the WNBA

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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