Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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marble

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

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How do you fit 100 charizards into a bus? Put them into pokeballs. Otherwise, there would be no possible way because Charizards are such large creatures.

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jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

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the your face joke

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

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What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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