A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Niko isnt a mexican douche

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +37

One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops