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So a baby seal walks into a club

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

What color is my lamp? Brown

why did the man die? he got shot

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

Hi poop!

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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