lewis bedford

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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69

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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I am funny, yes? No, you are not.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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a black guy leaves prison

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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