Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

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Penis

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how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

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Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

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Come in

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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. Deez nuts Ok

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Orange!" "Oranges can't speak, who is this really?" "Your neighbor Jake, can I borrow your lawn mower?" "Sure, let me go to the garage and get it for you."

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yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

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a guy asks another guy if he likes pepsi or coke the guy says coke and he doesnt agree so he kills him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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