what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops