Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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a black father

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A jew, an Arab, and A Scientist walk into a bar. The arab self explodes and kills them all

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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i fondle myself every night....

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How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

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Where else? The junk yard

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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but there is a road to the super market

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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