your momma is so old, she has heart problems

How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

25

What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

why did the chicken cross the road.

LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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