A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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drugs.

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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Why did the black man walk into KFC? He was terribly hungry and had a reasonable amount of currency with him to purchase food for his well being.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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women's rights

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

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why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Your life That's the joke

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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