Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

69

whats red white and blue? i dont know

What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

Chocolate tastes good.

What's 1+1? 4.

why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

this website...

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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