Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

Chuck Norris died.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

No.

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...