Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

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Why....... Because.

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

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Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

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hahaha

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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