Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

One time i ate a sandwich it was good

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

penis

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

25

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

Why did the plane full of Arabs crash? One of The engines failed

How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

Herman Cain

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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