A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Chuck Norris is a normal man.

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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69

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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The WNBA

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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