How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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why do asian people eat each other? because they are cannibles

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What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

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Niko isnt a mexican douche

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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drugs.

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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