why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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Haha

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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Penis

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

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A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

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*Knock Knock* "whose there?"... "me"

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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