What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

A man walks into a bar. [Insert punchline here.]

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

Two women were sitting in silence.

Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

A Black man walks out of a KFC.

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

Noah is Smart.

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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