Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

Two women were sitting in silence.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

the joke below me is not an anti joke

An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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