Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Got milk? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Chocolate tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

I dislike old people.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

haha.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

69

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops