What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

You are the third derivative of the position function.

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

Real jokes.

Two women were sitting in silence.

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

The size of Idris Elba's penis

Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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