What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

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Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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a horse walks into a barn

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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