How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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women's lacrosse.

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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What's green and wheels? Your mom.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

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Your mom.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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