Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

I am black.

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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