What's funnier than 24? 25.

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

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What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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I am black.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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