How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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marble

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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Rob Bell

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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