A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

Knock Knock! Come in.

If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

Lets go Detroit Pistons!

Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

Chocolate tastes good.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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