KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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Indeed.

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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28

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gay marriage.

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy There's the kitchen Sandwich maybe?

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

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Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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