There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

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Windows Vista

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How Many Friends Did The Ginger Kid Have? None.

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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