An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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Aodhan Hearty

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

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What's the best part about seventeen-year-olds? There's seven of them.

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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My dad beats my mom At checkers

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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SAY

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A black succeeds

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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I don't get it

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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