Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Real jokes.

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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I won the game.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Except not really, it couldn't fit through the door.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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