What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

why did the mexican slave have cuts and bruises all over her. She fell off her skateboard... Another joke by rangler. thumbs up for more.

Hey, come here often? No.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

A man buys free health care...

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...