A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

What time is it? 10:58

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

A fat man buys a salad

What is 6 plus 9? 15

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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