What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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I won the game.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

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What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops