How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

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Q; What's something that's long and girls like to suck? A: A popsicle

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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Real jokes.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

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Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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