Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A man buys free health care...

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the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

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Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

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How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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SPAMS!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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