Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

How do you leave a man in suspense...

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

Small breasts.

What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

Dead babies.

anus soup

Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

My dad beats my mom At checkers

What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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