A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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An elephant walks into a bar. Except not really, it couldn't fit through the door.

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Herman Cain

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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