You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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62

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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