Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

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if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Small breasts.

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Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

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This is not Will Smith.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

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A fat man buys a salad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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