Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

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Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

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how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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What do you call an aircraft piloted by a Muslim extremist? The aircraft's brand name followed by its model number, in all likelihood.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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