Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

Hello world

Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

GooglePlus.

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

im jewish

What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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