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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

Rebecca Black sings a song.

Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? the pizza wont scream when you put it in the oven.....

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

poop.........

why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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