A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

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That's what he said.

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How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

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Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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