Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

Penis

A jew and a black man walk into a bar the black man orders a screwdriver. The jrw asks him why did you order a screw driver.? The black man answer black:I enjoy screw drivers.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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