a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

no

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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