What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

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nbjhfghl

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

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there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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