What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Black people are innocent.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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im jewish

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

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Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Shit.

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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