Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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