Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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