Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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are you gay does your mom know

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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