- Anti Joke

why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

Ily bae

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops