whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

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what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

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To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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robin, get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops