What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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