a person who will soon die of beeties

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

human centipede

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

9/11 my birthday

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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